Angel / Alicia Mozina (friend)

"Today I stumbled and once again
     Was lifted by an unseen hand
  What comfort and joy that knowledge
     brings, For I hear the whisper of
             Angels wings"

 Lauren,
   You are missed everyday. What a impact you have left on everyones lives. You touched my life, and since your death I will never be the same. It is hard not to have hate in my heart for the poor excuse who ended you life so abruptly. Who was he to decide that it was your time to go. I wish he could see the catastrophy he has left on all the people who mourn for you every day. I hope he realizes the damages he has done. 

 When I think about Angels you always come to mind, and vis versa. I read in a book that Angels come as messengers to earth for a short period of time to give a messeage. I truley believe with all my being that you are an Angel with gold tinged wings, even a halo. When you were taken by God, It was as if the world stopped for the day and Heaven opened their gates. 

   I know you see us praying for you every night. We miss you so much! Your mom and Will continue to put me in awe, on how strong they are. I know you are so proud of the young man will has become. The Christmas season is in full bloom, and I see your mom and I hurt for her, she lost such a beautiful angel. God knows why he took you so soon, but he always has a plan for everyone. I look at Heaven and the older she is getting Lauren, the more she looks like you! I want to hold her so tight when I see her, because I know you left a little piece of yourself in her. Lauren, I don't know if you know this, but I always looked up to you, Boys, hair, cloths, SHOES. I always did admire you, I just wish I could have told you that when you were still alive. 

  We miss you sooooo much Lauren. You are always going to be loved, missed, and remembered. Your legacy will live on. God bless you everyday with his love!
Merry Christmas Lauren!
 love always,
   Alicia

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Poem from heaven  / Jess
They say that life is fleeting
I know that this is true
I left this world so quickly
With no goodbye to you.

I know how much you miss me
Your tears fall ever light
The pillow where you lay your head
Is wet with them at night.

I know your heart is hurting
The words we left, unsaid
I love you’s, left unspoken
Are spinning in your head.

The strength that I have carried
That served to make you whole
Remains to make you stronger
Within your grieving soul.

For you see, while you were weeping
On the day I passed away
At the gravesite near the flowers
Where my loved ones knelt to pray.

An angel came to see me
She took me by the hand
She led me to a kingdom
In a very distant land.

As I look down from heaven
And see you standing there
Your heart so ever burdened
With more grief than it can bear.

I long to bring you comfort
I long to give you peace
I long to hold you closely
Cause all your tears to cease.

The joy I’ve found in heaven
Goes far beyond compare
The love that’s so elusive
Can be found here everywhere.

The light is softly shining
There’s no storm clouds here or rain
There’s no teardrops found in heaven
There’s no suffering, there’s no pain.

You needn’t be so troubled
Stay close to God and pray
That someday we’ll be together
One bright and glorious day. 

So my love, you shouldn’t question
My dear you need not cry
I’ve gone to be with Jesus
I really didn’t die. Close

Christmas without you  / Jessica Zinsavage
The lights are blinking merrily
The tinsel’s on the tree
It sits there in the window
For all the world to see.

The house is filled with holly
And pinecone scents the air
The Christmas cards keep coming
Each one is hung with care.

The gifts are tied with ribbons red
And topped with pretty bows
I’m done with all the details
As far as Christmas goes.

The fire is softly glowing
I think about your touch
But Christmas isn’t Christmas
I miss you oh, so much.

If I could have just anything
My Christmas wish would be
To wake up in the morning
And find you here with me.

I reminisce our Christmas’ past
The joy and love we shared
Moonlit walks and midnight talks
And ways you showed you cared.

Staring at your picture
I long to be set free
Tonight the tears are streaming
As I hold it next to me.

Flakes of snow swirl through the air
I’m braced for stormy weather
I wait for brighter days ahead
When we can be together.

So hold a place in heaven dear
Someday when life is through
I’ll be the Christmas angel
Who shares this day with you.
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Christmas Poem  / Jessica Zinsavage
" I'm Spending Christmas with Jesus this Year"

I see the countless Christmas trees
around the world below
with tiny lights like heaven stars
reflecting on the snow

The sight is so spectacular
Please wipe away that that tear
For I'm spending Christmas
with Jesus Christ this year

I hear the many Christmas songs
That people hold so dear
O', the sounds of music can't compare
with the Christmas choir up here.

For I have no words to tell you
of the joy their voices bring
for it's beyond description
to hear the angels sing.

I know how much you miss me,
I see the pain inside your heart.
but, through our memories so dear..
We're never far apart.

I can't tell you of the splendor
or the peace here in this place
Can you just imagine Christmas
with Our Savior.......face-to-face.

I'll ask him to light your spirit
As I tell him of your Love.
Then I'll pray for 'One another'
As you lift your eyes above.

So please let your heart be joyful
and let your spirit sing
for I'm spending Christmas in heaven
and I'm walking with the king. Close

Wishing you and your family a  / Carole Mom To Angel Heather Bates
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baby girl  / Ashley Bishop (cuz)
R.I.P lauren we miss u so  much right know i wish i can be up with with u  baby girl i know u are looking down on all of us  even ur lil sister and brother and ur mother they miss u so much they wish they can see u one more time but we will some day right know ur happy love u lauren 
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Hello Laur  / JR McClung (Close Friend )
I dont know how to start but i will say i miss you .I miss you alot.  Nathan getting so big if you havent seen already.Hes starting to look more like his mother now. He laughs so much and smiles like no other baby i ever seen before. Im sorry I havent vist you in a while but with work and everything its hard to even stay awake at that. I wish you were here so that everyones pain can go away specially your mom, will, jess and the rest of your family. I wish i could speak with you one last time but i will one day, Im sure i will. Your brother is doing good hes keeping a good head on his shoulders but you see that. Heaven also big i seen her and your mom at walmart the other day and she looks just like you but with a hint of willy lol . Im sure you also see that.  I hope your dad forgives your mom because thats not her fault you know she wouldnt try and hurt no one like that im sure its all a misunderstanding. I wish the best for everyone in your family i wish i got to spend more time with them like the good ol days. I miss that alot but today is a new day and the holidays are coming up. Ill visit you soon maybe this weekend so till then i love you laur and ill see u soon. Close

Thinking of You & Your Family  / Melissa Smith Blakemoore.memory-of-.com

Dear Father who art in Heaven...
Please join our family on this Thanksgiving Day
and bless each one as we sit down to pray
as we remember those who have joined you above
so dearly missed and deeply loved.

Please provide us strength on this Thanksgiving Day
Bless us with memories of those faraway...
Please grant patience to family and friends as we grieve
and help us reach out to others who are bereaved.

We give thanks to you on this Thanksgiving Day....
For Your presence in our lives each and everyday.
For Your comfort, guidance, and never ending love...
And for taking care of our loved ones...in Heaven above.

As we light this candle on this Thanksgiving Day...
And it glows in memory of those in Heaven today....
May their lights always shine down on us and give us light...
And may we feel their presence along with yours tonight.

May the peace and tranquility of this Thanksgiving Day
Be an everlasting light within each of us along the way...
Lets bow our heads and give our Thanks to God above.
For our blessings, whether on earth or in Heaven above...
Amen

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Homesick by MercyMe -describes my feelings so much  / Mom
Homesick
MercyMe

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbyes
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now













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Lauren, May you and your family...  / Carole Mom To Angel ~Heather Bates
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Aunt Bev  / Jessica Zinsavage

Aunt Bev,

You were a GREAT mom to Lauren; don’t let anyone try to tell you different or make you feel like they are right. You always bent over backwards for Lauren and Will YOU are the one who has always been there for them when they needed you most. After everything you have gone through it’s a wonder you are still sane. I do not know what its like to lose a child and I can’t even imagine it, 3 years later you are still holding it together as hard and as painful as it is to go on with out her. Like I said when I sent you that email one word to describe you I said STRONG because you are the strongest person I know. You could have really fell apart and inside I’m sure you did but on the outside you held it together for Will who really needed you to be there for him. And look how great he is doing. There is no one to thank but yourself. Lauren loved you with out a doubt and I was there the last night when she said “I love you, mom” And she did. You’re a great person and a great mom. I love you. 
                                                                                 Love,
                                                                                 Jessica

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Lauren's Dad  / Lauren's Mom
I just want everyone to know that I am not the Monster that Lauren's father is making me out to be.   He is UPSET - after 3 years because there are no pictures of him on the website and I am a horrible person.   Let me start with saying that about 2 1/2 years ago when I started Lauren's website I told him about it.  He was not interested at the time.  Then I asked him if there were any picture of him and his family with Lauren so I could upload them on my website or for that matter they could and I would accept them.  He said yes he would give them to me.  He never did.  My boyfriend even made the comment to me that I should have them on my website and I said I have no pictures and no one will give me any.  As you can see on Lauren's "About ME" page I ask for pictures.  Well tonight - November 14, 2007- I gave Lauren father a piece of my mind.   I tooooooo lost Lauren.... I am sick of being the strong one and him using her death for an excuse.   I said to him I asked you for pictures years ago.  He said where are the ones you had.  I told him when we got divorced I let Lauren and Will go through all of the pictures.   Lauren has a lot in her stuff but I am sorry, I am NOT ready to go through her stuff... so that is why I asked for pictures on her website and I asked her father.   So to this day I am still the bad "guy/woman"    But in my heart I am the GOOD Mom.  Lauren loved me to the end..... I may have harped on her and yelled at her.... but that is a part of being a parent.  Her last words to me were Mommy I love you before she went out the night she was killed.   So I have NO REGRET AND NO GUILT.  MY CHILDREN ALWAYS COME FIRST.   People who truly know me... know the type of person I am.... I am straight forward, sacastic, loving and forgiving.   So may  God bless everyone because I can sleep at night knowing I was the best Mom and still am the best mom I can be.  I do not use my daughter's death as an excuse for anything.  I go on for my son and now since God blessed me with a new daughter, Heaven.  So Lauren's dad can dwell in his guilt and not move on with live... that is his choice.  It is a shame because he has a wonderful son who is a junior in high school, taking honors' classes, on the honor roll and loves his mom and dad uncondionally.   That is a child to be thankful for.   God Bless Little Will.... Open your eyes... Will, Sr.

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i love you lauren  / Jessica Zinsavage

Lauren,
I just came across a song that we would listen to in your room for hours. I mean you would put it on repeat and let it play over and over.(Angel by Amanda Perez) And today when I listened to it, it really made me cry.I haven't heard that song since we both listened to it and all I could think of was you. I love you so much and I can't even tell you,that hurts so bad you have no idea. All I can do is remember all the things we did together, every weekend we spent together, all notes we wrote each other (which I still have all the ones you wrote me)and pictures of memorable times to look back on. It's not good enough. I'd trade all that stuff just to have you HERE.I want you back in my life Lauren I can't take it anymore. I don't know who I am with out you. You are my best friend in the universe and some P.O.S just came and took you away from me and everyone who loved you. I HATE HIM and EVERYONE who was there that night. They WILL pay.Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow but there will be JUSTICE. I STRONGLY believe in an eye for an eye.

On another note I have nothing but undying love for you. Sisters Beyond Death right...thats what we would always say. Now its the truth. Funny how things piece together after the fact. I love you gerl...I miss you more than words can say.
Love always and forever jessica <33

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Friend / Jimmy Crowe (friend)
Hi Bev,
Dawn forward me this
I dont know what to say
Thought i needed to say something after looking at Laurens...
This is so beautiful
Love your friend
   Jimmy Close

Happy Halloween!  / Carole Mom To Angel ~Heather Bates (angel friend )
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Goodbye / Alicia (Friend)
I haerd this song and I started crying. You and your mom were the 1st people i thought of<3
"Mamma
You gave life to me
Turned a baby into a lady

Mamma
All you had to offer
Was the promise of a lifetime of love

Now I know
There is no other
Love like a mother´s love for her child

And I know
A love so complete
Someday must leave
Must say goodbye

Goodbye´s the saddest word I´ll ever hear
Goodbye´s the last time I will hold you near
Someday you´ll say that word and I will cry
It´ll break my heart to hear you say goodbye

Mamma
You gave love to me
Turned a young one into a woman

Mamma
All I ever needed
Was a guarantee of you loving me

´Cause I know
There is no other
Love like a mother´s love for her child

And it hurts so
That something so strong
Someday will be gone, must say goodbye

Goodbye´s the saddest word I´ll ever hear
Goodbye´s the last time I will hold you near
Someday you´ll say that word and I will cry
It´ll break my heart to hear you say goodbye

But the love you gave me will always live
You´ll always be there every time I fall
You offered me the greatest love of all
You take my weakness and you make me strong
And I will always love you ´til forever comes

And when you need me
I´ll be there for you always
I´ll be there your whole life through
I´ll be there this I promise you, Mamma

Mamma, I´ll be
I´ll be there through the darkest nights
I´ll be the wings that guide your broken flight
I´ll be your shelter through the raging storm
And I will love you ´till forever comes

Goodbye´s the saddest word I´ll ever hear
Goodbye´s the last time I will hold you near
Someday you´ll say that word and I will cry
It´ll break my heart to hear you say goodbye

´Till we meet again...
Until then...
Goodbye"
By: Celine Dion Close

My thoughts on Brittany - driver of getaway car  / Lauren's Mom
Today was like any normal day for me.  I went to work as usual, picked Heaven up and went about doing my errands.   I want to back track a minute----yesterday when I took Heaven to my work to deliver the pizzas that Will sold (by the way Will was stuck going to work with me too), everyone said Heaven looked like either Will or Lauren.   Well it really struck me hard on how God/Lauren gave me Heaven.  Tonight Heaven and I delivered pizzas (no that is not my new job) to our Aunt Tina & Uncle Pat's house and then we went to Walmart.  While in Walmart who do we see????? Brittany Edelman (spell???) with her grandmother  - who enables her to be the piece of shit that she is....... and her baby ....who is a 1/2......let me stop there.... everyone who knows me, knows what the kid is.  Ugly little piece of shit...boy..... anyway, I know she saw me.  She is UGLY now....I mean I thought i had a "beer/baby" belly... for a 18 year old she has nothing on me and if Lauren was not gone...OMG Lauren was build like a brick shit house.... anyway ...me and my stories...   I was thinking I am going to walk by her and tell her how much of a piece of shit she is and to let her know her kid is a curse from God and an ugly one at that....but then I looked at Heaven (who of course was trying to climb out of the cart) and I said NO!!! That is why God/Lauren gave me Heaven.   I need to let it go.  The n?????? Pig and the rest of them will get their day.  Hatred and vengence will get me now where.   I need to stop it.   It is just that if I did not have Heaven, I would have went after everyone involved.  That is why I know God/Lauren are looking out for me.   The only thing that does depress me is that Lauren had "so many friends/family" who loved her but are DOING NOTHING about what happened to her.  If the tables were turned and one of Lauren's loved ones/friends were murdered.... she would have took care of everyone involved and would have spent the rest of her life in jail but she would have made sure justice was done.   So many people say they love her  and miss her when they see me....but they are living their lives and Lauren is just a memory.   Justice will one day be served but it will be years................................... because I have to raise Heaven.  NO one will take care of the trash involved with Lauren's murder but me.   Screw all of her so called friends/family.......  Lauren knows who truly loved her... the MOTHER who got on her ass 24/7 but loved her unconditionally.    I just needed to vent tonight.  Thanks for listening... Close

Forever Loved, Never Forgotten  / Mesean Noble (Friend/ Classmate )

Hey Pinkii, I miss you so much its crazy! I was recently in Ocean City and I remembered the time you called me like two in the morning to say hey. I complained about you waking me up which is so hurtful because that was actually the last time we spoke to each other. Well not really because I speak to you all the time now. I still have your pic in my bible next to my bed! I just wanted to say I love you and REST IN PEACE babygirl.....

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Thinking of your angel  / Carole Mom To Angel ~Heather Bates
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you will always be..  / Carole Mom To Angel ~Heather Bates (angel friend )
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